Building the Life I Said I Wanted

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what I really want my life to look like.

Not the vague kind of thinking where you say, “I want to be successful someday.” But real, concrete thinking—with dates, milestones, and sacrifices attached to it.

And when I strip everything down, I realize I do have a true goal.

I want to be a PhD by May 2028. I want to pass the FE exam and become an EIT. I want to release my book in 2030. I want to become an Omega Psi Phi member after I finish my doctorate. And I want to remain single for the rest of my adulthood so I can stay focused on the life I’m trying to build.

That’s the vision.

But vision without discipline is just a daydream.

The Rules I’m Living By

I’ve started setting rules for myself because I know how easily I get distracted. I know how quickly I can fall into comfort instead of progress. If I don’t create structure, I’ll stay exactly where I am.

The first and biggest rule is about social media.

I need to scrub it completely.

If I truly want to be the kind of man worthy of becoming an Omega, I can’t have a digital footprint that contradicts that image. I’ve cussed online. I’ve posted emotional, unfiltered thoughts. My music isn’t always clean. Some of the comments I’ve made don’t reflect who I want to be in the future.

Right now, my social media represents who I was—not who I’m trying to become.

So at some point, I have to take extreme measures: clean everything, refine everything, and rebuild my image intentionally.

The FE Exam: The Gatekeeper

The FE exam is more than just a test for me.

It’s a turning point.

I’ve told myself something serious: If I don’t pass the FE exam in May, I will not be allowed on social media for five years.

That sounds excessive, even to me. But it’s meant to be a lesson.

I’ve spent too much time scrolling, watching, comparing, consuming. If I can’t prove that I have the discipline to pass this exam, then I don’t deserve the distraction of social media. Simple as that.

Passing the FE will mean:

• I’ve proven to myself that I can be taken seriously

• I can finally clean up my online presence

• I can start rebuilding my image the right way

• I can move forward toward my bigger goals

Right now, the world doesn’t really take me seriously. And part of that is my fault.

I haven’t demanded respect through results.

PhD First. Everything Else After.

The timeline is clear in my head.

Graduate with my PhD in May 2028. Then, the following year, pursue Omega Psi Phi.

Not before. Not during.

The doctorate comes first.

I can’t split my focus. I can’t be chasing titles, organizations, and validation while I’m still building the foundation. The degree is the foundation. Everything else sits on top of that.

The Job Question

I don’t even know what job I’ll have after graduation.

Maybe I’ll be a postdoc. Maybe industry. Maybe something I haven’t even imagined yet.

I’ve learned that life doesn’t reveal everything at once. Sometimes you have to reach the checkpoint before the next door opens.

But I do know this:

Nothing moves forward until I pass the FE.

That exam is the key to everything.

Fixing the Profile, Fixing the Person

My profile right now is not fixed.

Not just my online profile—but my real one.

The way I present myself. The way I manage my time. The way I handle discipline. The way I let emotions control my decisions.

All of that needs work.

And I’m finally at a point where I’m willing to admit that instead of running from it.

I don’t want to be the version of me that talks big and does little. I want to be the version that quietly builds and shocks people later.

Choosing Focus Over Feelings

Staying single is part of the plan.

Not because love is bad. Not because relationships are evil.

But because I know myself.

I get distracted. I get emotionally invested. I lose momentum.

Right now, my life requires tunnel vision.

PhD. FE exam. Book. Brotherhood. Career.

That’s enough for one lifetime.

The Man I’m Becoming

I’m not where I want to be.

But for the first time in a long time, I know exactly what direction I’m walking in.

I’m done drifting. I’m done hoping things work out. I’m done being casual about serious dreams.

May 2028 is not far away. 2030 is even closer than it sounds.

And everything I do from now on has to match those dates.

This isn’t about motivation anymore.

It’s about construction.

I’m building a life that will make sense one day—even if it doesn’t make sense to anyone right now.