Priorities, Deadlines, and the War Against Distraction

Lately, I’ve been realizing something uncomfortable but necessary:

I have too many goals.

And having too many goals is not always a blessing—it can be a burden if you don’t know how to prioritize them.

I’ve always been ambitious. I want to do research. I want to pass the FE exam. I want to release music. I want to write a book. I want to build a legacy. I want to graduate with a PhD. I want to be great.

But greatness doesn’t come from having dreams.

It comes from deciding what matters first and attaching deadlines to those decisions.

So I had to sit down with myself and ask a serious question:

What actually matters right now?

The Primary Mission: Graduating With a PhD

The most important goal in my life right now is simple, even if it feels overwhelming:

Graduate with my PhD by December 2028.

Or better yet—if I push hard enough—by May 2028.

Everything else in my life must align with that mission.

To graduate, I need scholarly work. And scholarly work requires aggression, discipline, and obsession.

1) Research Symposium: Not Just Participation—Domination

The first scholarly milestone is the research symposium.

Not just showing up. Not just presenting.

Winning first place.

To do that, I can’t be average in my research. I can’t be slow. I can’t be hesitant.

I have to move faster than my doubts. I have to move faster than everyone else.

Research is not just about intelligence. It’s about persistence.

If I want to win, I have to treat my research like survival.

2) ASME Conference: Building Academic Credibility

After the symposium, the next step is the ASME conference.

This is not just another presentation.

This is about positioning myself as a serious researcher.

Presenting at ASME means:

• stronger academic credibility

• stronger scholarly identity

• stronger foundation for future publications

It’s not optional. It’s strategic.

Every conference is a brick in the structure of my PhD journey.

The FE Exam: Proving I’m Serious

The second major priority is the FE exam.

Passing the FE exam is not just about engineering. It’s about identity.

It’s about proving—to myself and to the world—that I am not playing with my career.

To pass the FE exam, I can’t study casually.

I have to study aggressively.

I’ve decided on a system:

• Saturdays: mandatory FE study

• Sundays: additional study until I feel confident

• Practice tests: building endurance

• Guessing intelligently: training decision-making under pressure

The FE exam is not just about knowledge.

It’s about stamina.

It’s about sitting with discomfort and refusing to quit.

If I want to pass, I have to work harder than I ever have in my life.

No excuses.

Music: Important, But Strategic

The third priority is my album:

Tired of Everything.

This project matters to me emotionally and creatively.

It has a hard release date:

March 27, 2026.

To meet that deadline, I need a clear plan:

• Spring Break (early March 2026): finish and finalize all tracks

• Before Spring Break: organize songs in my DAW

• Spring Break: edit, refine, and complete the album

Music is part of who I am.

But right now, it cannot overshadow my academic priorities.

That’s why I made a decision:

Singles Come After the FE Exam

After I pass the FE exam on May 16, 2026,then I will shift into aggressive music mode.

That’s when I’ll start releasing singles.

Those singles will later become part of a compilation album.

This is not laziness.

This is strategy.

Comprehensive Exams: The Next Battlefield

After the FE exam comes another major challenge:

Comprehensive exams.

I will not start studying for comprehensives until after the FE exam.

Timeline:

• May 2026: Pass FE exam

• May–July 2026: Research + comprehensive exam preparation

• July or early August 2026: Take comprehensive exams

Once I pass comprehensives, I officially become a PhD candidate.

That moment is not just symbolic.

It’s transformational.

The Book: A Long-Term Vision

Then comes the book:

The Grand Terror.

This is not urgent—but it is meaningful.

Target release date:

July 23, 2030.

To achieve that, I need a long-term plan:

• End of 2029: complete the manuscript

• Early 2030: editing, refining, and polishing

• 2030: promotion and release

I want this book to:

• be nominated for a Hugo Award

• receive 5-star recognition

• represent the best version of my imagination

That means perfection is not optional.

It means patience.

It means obsession with quality.

The Philosophy: Isolation, Focus, and Discipline

Beyond deadlines and goals, there is a deeper truth:

If I want to achieve all of this, I cannot live like everyone else.

I have to stay to myself.

I have to grind harder than everyone else.

I cannot afford distractions disguised as friendships. I cannot afford emotional chaos disguised as relationships. I cannot afford doubt disguised as humility.

I’ve realized something painful:

Sometimes, feeling “not special” is just an excuse to stop trying.

And I can’t afford that.

Because sometimes, being special is not something you’re born with.

It’s something you prove.

You prove it by:

• working when you don’t feel like it

• studying when you feel incompetent

• creating when you feel burned out

• showing up when you feel invisible

Friends, Focus, and the Cost of Ambition

There are people in my life who might care about me.

But right now, I don’t have the luxury of emotional dependency.

During this PhD journey, my priorities are clear:

My real support system is:

• my parents

• my brother

• my professor (my advisor)

That’s it.

Not because I hate people.

But because focus requires sacrifice.

Some people think success is glamorous.

They don’t see the loneliness behind it.

The Final Truth: Work Like Your Life Depends on It

It’s easy to say:

“I’m not special.”

It’s easy to give up.

But if I want to be special—if I want to matter—if I want my life to mean something—

Then I have to work like my life depends on it.

Not just in career.

But in discipline. In identity. In purpose.

Because sometimes, the only way to become special is to refuse to live an ordinary life.

And that’s the decision I’m making.