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When Trying Isn’t Enough: Learning to Let Go and Take Life Seriously
Let me take a step back for a second and really process what happened, because I think that’s the only way I can move forward properly. Late February was the turning point. That’s where things started to shift in a way that I didn’t fully understand at the time. I made a decision to reach out to someone that, deep down, I probably shouldn’t have reached out to. Not because they’re a bad person, but because of what that connection represented for me mentally. It wasn’t stable.
trueproducer
Mar 273 min read
Why Was I Jealous?
This month is a crucial month for me. I can feel it. There are moments in life where you realize that the direction you're going in will determine a lot of what happens next, and I feel like I’m standing in one of those moments right now. I have a lot that I want to accomplish, especially with my music and the things I’ve been creating. But more than anything, this month is about discipline and learning how to move properly with the time and energy that I have. Recently I tal
trueproducer
Mar 125 min read
Learning to Stand on My Own
This morning started a little differently than usual. I woke up later than I normally do, and by the time I got up, my dad had already left for work. Most mornings I’m the one who takes him, so it felt strange realizing he had already gone. For a moment I wondered if I should feel guilty about that, but honestly I was exhausted. The last couple of weeks have been overwhelming, and my body is clearly still trying to recover from all of it. Still, the day doesn’t stop just beca
trueproducer
Mar 107 min read
A New Chance After a Difficult Stretch
After the past couple of weeks, I feel like I’ve been given something I didn’t expect—a new lease on life. Not in some dramatic, cinematic way, but in a quieter, more reflective way. The last two weeks were chaotic, exhausting, and honestly overwhelming. I went through midterms, back-to-back stress, and moments where I wasn’t functioning at my best. But now that I’m stepping back and looking at everything that happened, I feel like I’m being given another chance to make thing
trueproducer
Mar 95 min read
Before Therapy: A Moment of Honesty
I’m about to go into my therapy session today, and I feel awful. At the same time, a strange kind of relief has come over me. It’s like a weight has finally been lifted, but the path that led me to that relief was messy. I made mistakes along the way. I damaged connections with people. I mishandled situations. I tried to be everywhere all at once, except in the one place I actually needed to be. That’s the pattern I’m starting to notice about myself lately. I move fast. I jug
trueproducer
Mar 65 min read


Midweek Reflections: Being Unproductive, Being Worried, and Wanting to Be Taken Seriously
It’s the middle of the week, and classes have just begun. Normally, this is the part of the semester where motivation should still be high—where routines are fresh and optimism hasn’t worn thin yet. But instead of feeling focused, I already feel behind. Unproductive. Uneasy. Worried about where my future is actually headed. I’m drinking too much coffee, trying to force energy that doesn’t feel natural. I know that’s a sign in itself. When I rely on caffeine to manufacture urg
trueproducer
Jan 143 min read


2026: Discipline, Focus, and the Long Game
We’re officially in a new year— 2026 —and I won’t lie, it feels different. It feels heavy, but it also feels purposeful. After everything I went through last year, I made a vow to myself that this year would be the best year of my life , not because things will magically be easier, but because I’m finally willing to do the work without excuses. Last year taught me something humbling: I’m not special. And I don’t mean that in a depressing way—I mean it in a grounding way. Non
trueproducer
Jan 84 min read


🦃 I’m Tired, But I’m Still Trying: Thanksgiving Reflections & What Comes Next
🎥 Watch the Video: Click below to hear everything straight from me. (If you're reading this from my blog, the video is embedded here.) 📹 Video Title: Tired… But I’m Still Trying | End of Year Reflections & Music/Future Update 👉 Watch on YouTube ( https://youtu.be/ybufzfEZvD8 ) 🍂 Where I’m At Right Now Honestly? I had to make this video because I’ve been feeling overwhelmed and under-acknowledged. I’m not where I want to be in life. Not yet. And even though the end of t
trueproducer
Nov 27, 20254 min read


I'm Tired… But I'm Not Giving Up
Introduction: The Weight I Carry This year hasn't been kind to me. But honestly, I don’t think I expected it to be. What I did expect, though, was to make a choice and follow through — to either pursue school or dive straight into the workforce. That was the plan: be decisive, intentional, and take charge of my life. But if life has taught me anything, it's that plans rarely go as expected — especially when you're tired. And this year, I’ve been tired in a way that runs deepe
trueproducer
Oct 22, 20254 min read


Trust, Birthdays, and the Weight of a Heavy Month
A lot of hell happened this month— and the month isn’t even over yet. I’ve been sitting with this question, circling in my mind like a...
trueproducer
Sep 24, 20252 min read


From Regret to Resolve | My PhD Plans & Life Reflections | Blog Entry – May 2025
Things are finally moving in the right direction, and I’m grateful. But I know that just because things are getting better doesn’t mean I...
trueproducer
May 16, 20252 min read
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