From Regret to Resolve | My PhD Plans & Life Reflections | Blog Entry – May 2025

Things are finally moving in the right direction, and I’m grateful. But I know that just because things are getting better doesn’t mean I can coast. I have to stay focused. I can’t let this season of my life go to waste. Every single day, I have to make sure I’m planning out what I need to do—staying on top of my responsibilities, drinking water, and taking care of myself.

The weather has been helping my mindset, honestly. The sun’s been out, the sky’s been clearer, and that alone has helped boost my energy. But even with that good energy, there are still major things I need to handle.

PhD Journey Begins This Fall

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m officially starting a PhD program this fall—at the same university where I got both my bachelor’s and master’s degrees. It’s a huge step, and I know it’s going to be a challenge. But I’ve committed to finishing it in three years. That’s not common, but that’s my goal. And to get there, I’ve got to clear some things off my plate first.

What Needs to Be Done Before the Fall

There are three major projects I want to complete before the PhD program begins:

1. Finish and release my album

2. Pass the FE exam

3. Finish writing my book

Let’s break that down:

• The album is called Tired of Everything, and I’ve finished all the recording. The only thing left is to prepare for its release next month.

• The FE exam? That’s a beast. Studying has been hard, especially while juggling other projects, but I’m clearing space to give it my full attention.

• And the book… I’ve been putting it off, but tonight—or at the very least, tomorrow—I’m going to get to work on it. I want to finish it completely before the PhD starts, because once that journey begins, I’ll need all my focus.

Regret, Exposure, and Mental Growth

As I reflect on everything, I can't lie—there are regrets I carry. I’ve given too much of my time, too much of my energy, and even too much personal information to people who didn’t deserve it. I’ve overexposed myself, and in doing so, I gave people the upper hand over me.

There’s someone in particular who saw too much—someone I should’ve held back from. Instead of keeping my plans to myself, I showed them too much. And that’s a mistake I won’t repeat. I want to prosper, not watch my enemies prosper off my energy. That regret will fuel me. That regret will be what drives me through this exam, this degree, and this next phase of life.

Moving Forward

I'm excited about what’s ahead. But I’m also aware that things might still get harder. That’s life. And I’ve got to be ready for that. I’ve got to work on myself, stay grounded, and make peace with my past mistakes—so I don’t carry them into my future.

This is a new chapter. And I’m claiming it. No distractions. No setbacks. Just purpose.

Until next time—stay real, stay focused, stay building.